A lot of writers struggle with dialogue. Either their dialogue seems stilted or all the characters in their stories end up sounding exactly the same. Here are my thoughts on the subject…
“Hello Bob,” Dr. Bob said.
“Hello Dr. Bob,” Bob said.
“How are you feeling today?”
“I am not feeling very well.”
“I am sorry to hear that. Don’t worry Bob, I am going to make you feel better.”
“Thank you, Dr. Bob. Sleeping in the dumpster behind the 7-11 has been very difficult lately.”
“Why has sleeping in the dumpster been difficult lately?”
“The new gas station attendant empties the Slurpee machine into the dumpster every morning at 6:45AM.”
At this point the reader closes the book and turns on the television (or they continue reading because of the sheer absurdity of the above passage). Why? Because dialogue is character and character is story and that’s precisely what people want (just ask Joseph Campbell). The people speaking above don’t even sound human. Two robots talking are boring unless those robots are human in some way or another. Make sense? Everyone has different speech patterns and everyone has their own vocabulary. Find those patterns and words for each of your characters. A hobo isn’t going to be as well spoken as a doctor, at least not in most cases.
It’s also fallacy that you should write exactly the way people talk. People talk for very long periods of time about absolutely nothing. No one wants to read long drawn out conversations that don’t go anywhere. You should, of course, write the way people speak line by line, but don’t include unnecessary lines that occur in our day to day lives. I’ve heard the saying, “Fiction is life with all the boring parts cut out.” Or something a long those lines. I think this is even more important for dialogue. Every line of dialogue should drive the action. Get to the meat. If the point of an exchange is Jack telling Jill that he ruffied her and that the bandages on his “crown” are a prop to take attention away from her own injuries, we don’t need to hear the entire hour long conversation that leads up to it. Just get to the point.
This isn’t to say that all your characters should say exactly what they are thinking. Subtext is very important. In my experience, subtext changes drastically with context. Let’s look at another little exchange and then add context.
“You look gorgeous today,” John said.
“Thanks,” Susan replied.
Pretty straight forward right? Let’s add some context.
Susan came out of the bathroom wearing dark purple eye shadow, too much blush, and crimson lipstick. Her large ass was barely contained by the tiny piece of fabric she called a skirt. John leered at her and saw nothing but dollar signs. Sure Susan didn’t make much per trick, but what she lacked in quality, she made up for in quantity.
“You look gorgeous today,” John said.
“Thanks,” Susan said and flicked ashes from the Pall Mall she was smoking onto the floor.
The two lines mean something completely different now, right?
I would like to say that dialogue comes naturally to me, but that’s not the case. The reason why my dialogue is so crisp, especially compared to my prose (as you can see), is because I have read so many plays. It amazes me how many fiction writers out there that struggle with dialogue don’t read plays and continue to have characters sound wooden.
Go to your local library and check out plays. Read them. Tennessee Williams, Arthur Miller, David Mamet, Sam Shepard, Christopher Durang, and Eric Bogosian are just a few writers that come to mind. All of these writers have knack for very realistic dialogue. Become familiar with the methods they use and your dialogue will improve immensely.
Another trick to improving dialogue is to read it out loud. If it sounds like shit when you are saying it, chances are it is shit. Rewrite until it doesn’t sound like shit anymore. Easy, right? Inhabit your characters fully. Pretend you are an actor playing the roles of the characters in your story. Have conversations with yourself while you drive in your car or walk the dog. Do the voices. Have fun with it. I guarantee that when you transcribe what you are saying out loud, your characters will come to life on the page. The neighbors might call the police and have you shipped off to the loony bin, but it will be worth it.
What are your thoughts on dialogue? Do you have any tricks of the trade that work for you?
